The “Addictive Personality” Misnomer

I’m often asked if there’s an addictive personality…as though people with substance use disorders (SUDs) can be identified through that one trait, but there’s not. There are, however, common personality traits that those with SUDs tend to have.  

See if you recognize anyone in these traits: impulsivity, disinhibition, manipulative tendencies, a lack of accountability, a lack of empathy, and an inability to handle stress. (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3996683/)

Admittedly, this list basically encompasses the full gamut of people, but let’s narrow it down to adolescents. Have you ever played a board game with a youth or asked a question he didn’t want to answer? I really believe that when kids turn a certain age it’s pretty much their job to lie, and it’s the adults’ job to figure out the lies. Kids are manipulative, probably because they can’t handle stress.

But eventually most grow out of those behaviors. Unfortunately, some adults still have these traits, and these are what we see as the “addictive personality.” Two of the traits that really stand out to me are impulsivity and inability to handle stress. 

First, let’s consider impulsivity. Impulsivity and disinhibition — lack of restraint manifested in disregard of social conventions and poor risk assessment — go hand in hand, but we usually see disinhibition AFTER substance use has occurred rather than before. Impulsivity is likely the number one trait that gets labeled as “addictive personality.” We all know this person, and if you don’t, that’s because you’re it. People who are impulsive fly by the seat of their pants, and their decisions are the ones that make us scratch our heads: “Hmmmmm, that’s not a decision I would’ve made.” In actuality, it’s not really a DECISION they made either; it’s just what they do WITHOUT thinking it through. These are big and little decisions, life-changing and mundane. 

Next is the inability to handle stress, which is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension. Some people would say that anxiety is different than stress because stress is an external force but anxiety is internal 

(https://www.apa.org/topics/stress/anxiety-difference) or that stress generally has a specific trigger (https://www.healthline.com/health/stress-and-anxiety).

As a person who suffers from generalized anxiety disorder, I disagree, but my husband and I say we don’t argue definitions. Anxiety is defined as intense, excessive, and persistent worry and fear about everyday situations. Is “strain or tension” really vastly different than “worry and fear”? Take my word for it: it’s not. 

I explain all this to describe the people who have an inability to handle stress. Sometimes this inability is blowing up; other times it’s an inability to make decisions. Mostly, when it comes to substance use disorder, it’s a complete change of personality once a substance is used. These are the folks who become much more gregarious when they drink. And these are also the people who become much more aggressive. The cryers. The fighters. The drunk dialers. The adventurers. The lovers. It’s as though all the stressors are relieved once a substance is used — until the substance is recognized as the stressor. 

When interviewed, those who have these traits will say they don’t handle stress well or that they are impulsive, and so will those who know them. So, while there’s no addictive personality, there is a clear opportunity for conversations about personality traits that those with SUDs tend to have. Since talking about SUDs is so difficult, maybe their personality traits can be a starting place.